Momma Sandy Says - Nature vs. Nuture

Momma Sandy Says

Nature vs. Nuture

   There's always a lot of debate about how the personality, appearance, etc. of a child are formed.  It's the classic nature vs. nurture argument.  I'd like to put my 2 cents in on this one.  In my opinion, a person is formed by nature (genetics), nurture (what he experiences or is taught), environment (what toxins were they exposed to), and something I call the "Surprise!" factor.

   Scientists are getting better at genetics all the time.  Some things they can test for.  They can even give you decent probability for a lot of things.  But a person's appearance is still somewhat unpredictable.  There are just too many variables.  

   For example, both of my parents had blue eyes.  Blue eye color is a recessive gene, therefore it was logical that I have blue eyes as well.  However, the shade of blue in my eyes is not that of either of my parents.  My father was a towhead who eventually darkened to a dark brown before going gray.  I did the same.  But I had red in my hair as well, from my mom.  I think this is why both my kids have red hair - their father was a full redhead.  But the freaky detail is that my body shape is that of my father's mother.  I even have her nose.  How that happens, I don't know, but it does.  Just like my mom has a horrid allergy to bell peppers.  I didn't get that.  But my daughter did.

   Body language can be inherited as well.  When he was less than a day old I realized my newborn son had the same startle motion as his dad.  They walked the same way when they were toddlers too.  We have video footage to prove it.  My daughter, at a young age demonstrated the same "jumping for joy" that I used to do.  My mom verified that.  Interesting stuff.  I have no idea how that happens.

   The nurture aspect is being verified by twin studies.  What happens when you separate identical twins at birth and raise them in different households?  The genetic predispositions are still there, but they are affected by the differing moral and ethical beliefs of their families.  The different life experiences, both good and bad, further affect the individual.  

Maybe I only consider the environmental factors because I believe they affected me.  My parents owned and worked in a small town print shop.  I was exposed invitro and from childhood to toxins from the printing ink.  At less than a year old I developed a combination of asthma, eczema, and allergies (trees, weeds, animal dander, etc.).  I never did outgrow it, despite the hopes of my doctors.  There was no genetic reason for my condition.  I survived the medical problems of my childhood and learned to live with it.  That shaped my personality in ways that genetics and nurture never could have.

Lastly, there's what I call the Surprise! factor.  Sometimes out children turn out in ways that cannot be explained by anything else.  They are not like anyone in the family, even several generations back.  Or their appearance is unexpected.  Just one of those random surprises the universe likes to throw at us.

   So why did I write about this tonight?  For one thing, it's interesting.  I think all pregnant parents dream about their child to come and wonder what it will look like?  Genetics can give hints,  As a child is born and grows, it's always a question of what he or she will be like as an adult.  We like to think about the possibilities.

   But it's also a bit of a warning.  Our children are not scientific experiments.  Or at least, they shouldn't be.  Trying to raise our children to fit a mold we choose is just, plain wrong.    We should guide our children towards being responsible adults.  But forcing them, nope.